Secret Cancer

The last thing to leave us is HOPE. When the doctors thought my husband was on deaths door. I told them “do not take my hope away”. I need to believe he can survive this” and he did. He survived. The doctors said that the last thing to leave us all, is hope. We as human beings need hope in the most tragic of circumstances. Hope is the light that keeps us going and keeps us from giving up. It is the thing that gets me out of bed every morning.

Even, when I can see that my husband is slowly fading away, I hope that the doctors are wrong. I hope that if he just gets the rest he needs, if his body can just recover, or if his immune system would just kick in, we will be ok. He can survive this. I hope and I refuse to give it up. When everything seems dark, there is hope. Hope is the light in this terrible darkness that I am in.

As I look back on our cancer journey, I can see how hope kept us going. With every bad news we received, we still hoped that the next treatment would work. Even now, I see our hope reflected in our friends and family. They too hope because in the end all you have is hope. My faith gives me hope that if my husband fades away in this life, there is an eternal one waiting for him.